Im Yesh Gan Eden 31/1/08

I finished reading the book Im Yesh Gan Eden (Beaufort in English) and I can’t stop thinking about it. The book (now made into a movie, that I haven’t seen yet, that has been nominated for an Oscar) is about the First Lebanon War and Israel’s disengagement from their “security zone” whose purpose was to protect the cities and towns in the North from attack by Hezbollah. The book follows the military service of the last unit to pull out of one of the main fortresses in the Israeli defensive line. It is the first full book I have read in Hebrew and it was amazing. I read it in less than 2 weeks and couldn’t put it down or stop thinking about it. Aside from being written very well and in a captivating and absorbing style, the story that follows the lives and deaths of a dozen or so soldiers raises serious questions that I think will haunt me for a long time.

The first part of the book describes their first round of service in the Beaufort fortress in Southern Lebanon. It is a tough life but the soldiers persevere and work hard to succeed because they know that the security of the Northern half of the county rests with them. By the time they start their second “tour” at the fortress, the government has already decided to withdraw all troops from Lebanon. The soldiers return to even harsher conditions but without the conviction that what they are doing has any purpose. They are continually discouraged as their comrades die and they no longer are able to convince themselves that they are fighting for a cause. Why die here now when in 4 months we are going to retreat? The book also describes the general public’s reaction to the whole affair. They lose patience and put pressure on the soldiers and make their missions even more difficult. They are dieing and the people they are trying to protect aren’t even proud of them.

The most chilling part of the book is the end. The narrator in a bout of nostalgia wishes he could return to the area of the fort but rather than a military outpost he will find an internationally acclaimed resort. He knows this will never be the case and says that the next time he will return it will be in another war. Hezbollah will kidnap soldiers and start firing rockets on the North. The Air Force will think they can win the war alone but in the end it is the ground troops who will reenter Lebanon and fight house to house to protect the country. The book was published a year before the Second Lebanon War broke out and that is exactly what happened.

I can’t stop thinking about now how awful it all is. I can’t stop thinking about the number of soldiers who lost their lives well after the government gave up on the mission and decided to withdraw. I can’t stop thinking about how we keep handing land over to the enemy on a silver platter without any consideration to our strategic defense. I can’t help thinking that I live in a place with an irresponsible government who care more about the politics than about the results of their decisions. I can’t stop thinking about people who are of the delusional opinion that there really is a peace process and that there is a rational partner to peace. Why don’t people see that we have an enemy and the only way to protect ourselves is to fight fire with fire? Why does my home have such a terrible identity crisis that its citizens can’t band together to fight for a common goal and understand the importance of this land as a Jewish land?

I feel heavy and upset and deflated. I am here because I am idealistic. I believe that the Jews need to be together in the Jewish homeland. I believe that there is no other place for me in the world. But at the same time, I sometimes feel that the problems here run so deep that we will never be able to fix them. Sometimes I just want to cry for all of the people who have died seemingly for nothing. It makes me want to scream that slick and evil politicians like Olmert are still in office and refuse to take responsibility for their actions administering a war that couldn’t be won under the conditions the army was given. As much as I love being here sometimes it hurts me physically. Where will we be in 20 years? Will there even still be an Israel? I pray that there will be and that one day we will have leaders who will be willing and able to make the tough decisions that will truly solidify our nationhood. Until then I don’t know. I simply don’t know and it makes me want to cry.